3 Reasons College Moms Need Comfort Right About Now
It’s August. And if you are a mom with college kids, I guarantee you that you could use some comfort right about now. If you’re not a mom of college kids, here are the three reasons why those with college kids need comfort:
1. Our houses are a little out of our control. All homes with kids are chaotic in the summer… so moms of the world unite in our summer house frustration. But college kid houses take things just a little bit farther. Maybe it's because these are young adults who have lived without “home rules” for some time now and push things more. Those early days of summer when we were loving on having our babies home are 90 days ago. Those days of actually being happy to see that there were extra dishes to put away because they were home, have moved on. From the “I’ll do it for you honey” phase to the “Why can’t you ever put your dishes in the dishwasher!!” phase. Stuff is all over the house. All kinds of stuff. All over. Glasses, pillows, blankets, empty soda cans, socks, sweatshirts, oh and friends, all strewn everywhere. We wonder if anything we’ve taught them for the past 18-22 years has even possibly sunk in a teeny tiny bit. We suffer from a lack of sleep for worrying every night where they are and what time they will be home. We are convinced that the next call will be about a car accident or some other crisis. Our pocketbooks have taken a serious hit while our credit cards, car keys and pieces of our favorite clothing have gone missing.
2. We feel guilty. We want our routine back. We want normalcy. But we don’t want them to leave either. So, we feel guilty every time we wish we could have our normal “school year routine” back. And we know there are just a few of these summers before they leave for good. We feel guilty about being frustrated. About yelling at them for the 900th time to clean their room. We don’t like to be frustrated at them anymore for the things that we were frustrated at them about before they went to college. Somehow, we thought that college would magically mature them into perfect little rule followers.
3. We are mourning the "momming". It’s not that we don’t love the stage they are in, because we do. We love the talk of their futures and all of the amazing possibilities ahead for them. We love hearing about everything they are learning and how dang smart they are! We love the fun memories we made over the summer and we love the fact that they are still happy to be home. But it’s mourning the momming. Facing the fact that they don’t really need us as much anymore. They are living their dreams now… they are in charge. Not us. They are excited to leave the house, to be back with their friends. And that hits the gut. We’ve all been there, so we understand it. But truth be told, we still wonder how they can be so happy to be leaving home.
Adding these all up, us college moms find ourselves somewhere between crying at the drop of a hat and pulling our hair out. And that's a whole lot of emotions. And it's hard. Harder than we expected. We wonder how our own moms did this and we have a whole new level of appreciation for them and how they gave to us our wings.
So if you’re a college mom – text or call another college mom. Tell them that you feel their pain and are thinking of them. Have a girl’s night out.
If you’re not a college mom but know a college mom - call or text them. Tell them that you can only imagine what they’re going through and take them out for a glass of wine or cup of tea.
To all of the college moms out there. I get you... We love, we cry, we plan, we cheer, we give, we clean, we laugh, we drive, we cook, we mom. It’s just a new kind of momming now.
Jen Marr is Founder & CEO of Inspiring Comfort LLC. Learn more about how you can comfort better at www.inspiringcomfort.com